It's not great, but it will do.

     One of Satu's favorite games is called " What if I was a paraplegic?" The rules are very simple though it is difficult for me to play and I have never actually won a round. The game starts with a hug, and then without warning, player 1 (Satu) will go limp and heavy in player 2's (me) arms. The objective is for player 2 to not let player 1 fall on the floor and also to get her upstairs and tucked into bed for the evening without injuring her in any way. Player 1 decides who wins.
     Satu is a small, but very unwieldy package when she becomes dead weight. That's not an excuse, just  a fact. One recent evening after a nightcap, I approached my love with outstretched arms. It is usually easier to get a hug after a nightcap since she is much less squirmy, and I like to get her in my arms whenever she can be caught. I soon found myself with an arm full of giggly, but otherwise immobile girlfriend.
     I stopped for a moment to strategize. Could I put her on my shoulder? No, that would risk me banging parts of her on the door frame. Should I grab her bottom and hoist her onto my hip? I thought about holding her bottom for a long moment. I would never get her up the stairs, but even after I had decided against it, I thought about holding her bottom just to enjoy the daydream. Finally, I decided to lean her upper body into the crook of my left arm and carry the rest of her like a stack of school books under my right. It wasn't ideal, but maybe I could make it upstairs this time.
     We played one step at a time, taking time-outs on each step. At the top of the stairs, excited by the possibility of my first win, I began to shuffle quickly toward the bed, accidentally kicking a cat. My arms were starting to fail, so the success of the game would depend these last few steps. I made it to the bed and dropped Satu on her side of the mattress. Her feet dangled off the side and she dropped into a heap as soon as I let her go. Out of breath, but feeling victorious, I scooped up her feet and tucked them under the covers. She didn't look comfortable, but she was also not injured this time. Inside I did a victory dance. It's not great, I thought, but it will do.
    I walked over to my side of the bed, climbed in and opened the book I had left on the night stand. I had barely read the first sentence before I became uncomfortable with the bedroom's silence so I sneaked a glance over at Satu. Sure enough, she was staring at me with the kind of astonished expression on her face that means I have fucked up." What?"I asked.
"It's not great, but it will do? IT WILL DO!??"
"Holy shit," I said "you heard that? You can hear me think?"
"No girl, you said that out loud," she said playing it totally deadpan.
I couldn't believe it, but it struck me as hilarious and both of us laughed until we were in pain. Now, every once in a while, to remind me to do my best, Satu will look at me and say "Meh. It's not great, but it will do."